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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 8:22 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
Posts: 6490
Location: Ottawa
I read a lot of stories here and on Facebook about people in the allergy community sharing accommodation with friends or family be it visiting or travelling with them. It seems that whether we have them stay with us, we stay with them or we all share a hotel or condo, friction can arise.

After reading many such stories about arrangements that have gone wrong allergy wise, I think it's time to be proactive. I’ve been thinking about it and this is a list of what I’ve come up with, please share your thoughts with me. Maybe together we can come up with an action plan that will help make future experiences create positive memories.

It's hard to figure all the details before hand because we wouldn't dream of doing these things but we really need to have ground rules upfront for visitors or travel companions who share hotel rooms/condos.
1. Identify the goal. It is about the experience and safety means positive experience.
2, Allow the other party to be an active participant in the discussion so that it doesn't seem to be "your way or the highway".
3. List all allergens and discuss cross contamination.
4. Discuss comfort level regarding risk of exposure.
5. Determine what might be deal breakers.
6. Get consensus of what is acceptable.
7. Recognize that situations may occur that have not been considered and agree beforehand that these may need to be discussed.
8. Remember that it is precisely because you have a GOOD relationship that you are embarking on this joint venture and that this is necessary in order to preserve the relationship.
9. Approach it from the perspective that yes it is a huge effort on their part to step into your shoes and they will probably make mistakes but it is their efforts to try that shows the level of caring NOT their missteps...it is a huge learning curve and we live this 24/7.
If we forget to mention it at the beginning, how can we expect them to think of it?

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Daughter: asthma, allergies to egg, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, most legumes (not soy) & penicillin. Developing hayfever type allergies.
Husband: no allergies
Me: allergies to some tree that flowers in May
Cat: allergic to beef, pork and lamb


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 4:11 pm 
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Joined: Sun Nov 30, 2008 11:00 am
Posts: 1119
Good idea!

We also talked about which foods have a smell that really bother someone and didn't cook those either (e.g., fish, onions etc)

Another category is: Perfumes, aerosol sunscreen etc.

When my brother was cooking a meal we asked for his menu and then just asked for a few modifications to make it safe and inclusive. :happydance

Another thing is to explain that the person with food allergies typically does NOT want to talk about it all the time or have a fuss made. They just want a safe meal. e.g., my sister would almost put out armed guards around the safe food so that only my daughter could get to it. While we appreciated the precaution all that was needed was for my daughter to serve herself first.

Oh, for once, at a family function other than our home I would love to see desserts that are all safe rather than - here you go, child with food allergies, you get this one cookie but everyone else gets pie, ice cream, nanaimo bars, cheesecake etc. At our most recent function - 3 desserts served and not a single safe one but we expected that and brought an amazing nut-free cupcake.

_________________
me: allergic to crustaceans plus environmental
teenager: allergic to hazelnuts, some other foods and environmental


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 5:15 pm 
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Site Admin

Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
Posts: 6490
Location: Ottawa
Yes, it isn't easy to bring it up but it's important in order to have a positive experience.
As with situations, you'll be able to read how receptive thers are to your request and this will foreshadow what you can expect.

_________________
Moderator
Daughter: asthma, allergies to egg, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, most legumes (not soy) & penicillin. Developing hayfever type allergies.
Husband: no allergies
Me: allergies to some tree that flowers in May
Cat: allergic to beef, pork and lamb


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 Profile  
 
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