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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 1:51 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 03, 2005 9:38 pm
Posts: 1643
Location: Toronto
I'm feeling so stressed right now. I need safe hot dog buns. I absolutely NEED THEM!

We are having a HUGE family get together. There will be anywhere from 16 - 30+ people coming to my home for a b-b-q. People arriving from all over (one from overseas) and I don't even know how many people will be sleeping here. My home is not that big. So, all that is stressful enough.

My husband has been phoning people this week, trying to find out who is coming, who is staying, etc. His brother tells him that his son will only eat hotdogs. Nothing else. (Get real people -- I don't believe that in 10 years he eats them every day. grrrr!) Whatever.

My hotdog buns are not good. If we buy buns (may contain sesame seeds) then we can guarantee other people will want them too. There is absolutely no way to keep everything safe and THIS IS MY HOME. It's the one and only place I DEMAND food safety. We do have separate ketchup/mustard etc., for when people are eating may contain buns -- but with all these people??????? We can't keep everything separate and safe. It can't happen.

Here's where the mean part comes in. My opinion is -- if hot dogs is the only thing he'll eat, then he can eat it either with (Anna-safe) bread, or with nothing. This is the first time they are coming to our home. I've only met this kid and his mom one time. I'm sure I'm being a horrid hostess.

I'm not looking for help with this post. There is none to be had. :cry: I just wanted to share my primal screaming with people that would understand it.

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self: allergy to sesame seeds and peanuts
3 sons each with at least one of the following allergies: peniciilin, sulfa-based antibiotic, latex, insect bites/stings


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 2:21 pm 
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Joined: Tue Sep 12, 2006 8:25 pm
Posts: 233
Location: Winnipeg
I don't think you're being mean at all. There is nothing wrong with having a hot dog without the bun, or with plain bread. I'm sure he'll live!

And notice I'm not offering help or advice, just sympathy and agreement. :wink:

_________________
1 son allergic to eggs, peanuts, green peas, chick peas, lentils and tomatoes
(avoiding tree nuts and most other legumes too)
1 son allergic to eggs, and has outgrown peanuts
Both with many environmental allergies, asthma and eczema


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 5:29 pm 
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Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2005 6:39 pm
Posts: 2928
Location: Toronto
While we're ranting ..

I'm soon going up to a cottage that we rented, and explaining to vegetarian visitors that we've invited that they can't bring food with ANY soy in it. I'm happy to feed them, I'll grill beautiful veggies from here till forever.

But I'm being asked whether the bbq could be scrubbed after a soy-containing sauce is used. I've said no, and yup, now I get to feel like the bad hostess, too.

But this is out of my comfort zone. If I anaphylax, it's an hour and some to hospital. I can't take the risk. I wish people could respect that we food allergics have some rules, and they must abide by them when under our roof.

It's lousy to be put in the bad guy role - I like these people.

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Allergic to soy, peanut, shellfish, penicillin


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:15 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 03, 2005 9:38 pm
Posts: 1643
Location: Toronto
I'm glad I'm not mean all by myself. :wink:

When my husband came home from work tonight I talked to him about it. I'm going to make some french stick bread and try to make hotdog buns out of it. We have discovered that my french stick makes terrific sub-buns -- so, making them a bit smaller might work. The party is in a week and a half, so I have time. If that doesn't work -- it's either bread or plain dogs for the kid.

My husband is completely supporting me about this. It's all his family (and our children and grand-children) so I'm glad he's not suddenly going wonky on me. He does appreciate that I'm making this attempt at buns -- and he's hoping they work because then most of the kids will want hot-dogs and that will be much cheaper to feed this horde. :lol:

With small groups we do buy *may contain sesame* buns. By 4 years old my grandson knew not to sit beside me when he's eating that, and only use the *cootie bottles* of ketchup and mustard. But, with a bunch of people that are not accustomed to dealing with this, it would be ridiculous to expect them all to *get it* in one day.

*********

Gwen, we used to rent the same cottage every summer down on the east coast. The woman owned three cottages, and each year she would purchase something new for one of them (maybe a mattress, or a microwave, whatever was needed). She knew about my allergies, and started buying a new grill every summer. She would wait until we were arriving, and we would get the new grill, and then the grill from our b-b-q would replace whatever one was the oldest. It was so nice to be able to eat on vacation without excessive worrying -- we were about an hour from the hospital, although we made it there in about 40 minutes when our son had his first reaction.

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self: allergy to sesame seeds and peanuts
3 sons each with at least one of the following allergies: peniciilin, sulfa-based antibiotic, latex, insect bites/stings


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:52 pm 
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Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2005 11:21 am
Posts: 684
Location: Cobourg, ON
What about the Philsbury crescent rolls that can be wrapped around a weiner - or maybe that would be too much work since they couldn't be made ahead of time. Or just use plain bread. It is definitely not reasonable to stay at someone's home and insist that their child can only eat one food. Come on.

I completely agree with your position. Your home has to be safe for you and with a large crowd there is too much potential danger of cross-contamination of everything in your home. People should appreciate the fact that you are hosting, going through so much effort to make them comfortable and respect your health needs.

We had a grilling disagreement this summer also. My daughter might be fish allergic. Her skin test was positive with a small wheel and we are waiting to do the RAST. While we were at relatives this summer, they wanted to do salmon on the same grill as the meat my daughter would be eating. The hardest part of this issue was that my husband was supporting his relatives in this disagreement. I had to be the bad guy and really fight everyone on it. They wanted to use a cedar plank and wrap her food in foil. This grill was going to be used throughout our stay at this home too. I tried to explain all of the possible problems but in the end I was the bad daughter in law when we couldn't eat the salmon. When there are so many other meats we can grill safely, choosing one that she might be allergic to did not make sense and seemed irresponsible.

Then to top it off my husband was mad at me for arguing the point. Well... I did not talk to him for two days after that (aside from when I needed to talk about the kids or "pass the potatoes please"). It made for a pleasant trip as you can imagine. He apologized eventually. This was very out of character for him. I hate being viewed as the crazy allergy mom who is not reasonable but I felt I had no choice but to speak up for my daughter and I would do it again in a similar situation.
Life is complicated sometimes with allergies.

_________________
11 year old daughter -- lives with life-threatening allergies to milk, eggs and peanuts; seasonal allergies (birch, maple, ragweed); pet allergies; asthma; and eczema
9 year old son - no allergies


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 9:28 pm 
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Joined: Sat Sep 16, 2006 6:50 pm
Posts: 205
Location: Ontario, Canada
I don't think you are being mean either. It does not make sense that one child's food request supersedes another child's safety requirement. But, i'm glad you found an easy way out. :D

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daughter: 6 years tree nuts, peanuts


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 9:53 pm 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
Posts: 6429
Location: Ottawa
AnneMarie-Two thoughts:
1. You could create several recipes using hot dogs as the main ingredient and when they tell you that he will only eat it in a bun you can smack your forehead and say, "Oh, a bun..., I thought you said he only ate Hot Dogs...
More Hot Dog Jello Salad, anyone?"
1. Here is a recipe for Hot Dog Buns, from what I understand it is all in the rolling of the dough.

Gwen-
1. Have you ever seen those little disposable charcoal grills? They are about 6" x 10" and I had seen them at Canadian tire, Wal-Mart and other such places. They might be hard to find right now, but they might do the trick for this person.
If you are going to have a duel between one persons dietary choice and another persons medical condition I say you should win.
2. Do you believe that they won't try to sneak some soy in there? Do they understand that an Epi-Pen is only good for 10-15 minutes and that you could potentially die?

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Daughter: asthma, allergies to egg, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, most legumes (not soy) & penicillin. Developing hayfever type allergies.
Husband: no allergies
Me: allergies to some tree that flowers in May
Cat: allergic to beef, pork and lamb


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 10:08 pm 
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Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2005 6:39 pm
Posts: 2928
Location: Toronto
Susan,

I think we'll be ok and the soy will stay home. I'd be fine with a portable grill if it were at my home, 10 minutes from hospital and superb health care. In fact, I do have a bottle of soy sauce at the back of my home fridge for those who occasionally eat it.

But my comfort factor in the boons is that I don't want to be around soy, period - I have anaphylaxed on the stuff. And I've been biphasic; twice.

Fortunately, I've won these friends over with my roster of Italian recipes: grilled vegetable lasagna; vegetarian linguine. All will be well fed for the couple of evenings in question.
I think they do now understand - but sometimes the 'xplaining process can get to a person.

Perhaps we should all just make personal podcasts and play them for people before they come for dinner.

KateC - With you 100%. Fish on the grill with her food next to it? No way! Too much potential for cross-contam.

But to close for the evening - for every frustrating story we have, every once in a while a pleasant surprise. AM, I love your woman with the new grills. Really. :D

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Allergic to soy, peanut, shellfish, penicillin


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2007 9:43 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 03, 2005 9:38 pm
Posts: 1643
Location: Toronto
gwentheeditor wrote:
AM, I love your woman with the new grills. Really. :D


It's really funny how that all started too. We rented this little cottage that was advertised in the PEI vacation guide. My husband had to work in NB, so drove down (expenses paid by his company) and I flew to the island with our youngest son. Hubby got to the cottage and started unpacking. The first thing he does is takes out the bread machine and starts a loaf of bread. The owner of the cottage was standing there talking to him, and started good natured teasing about a man baking bread. He explained about my allergies. She asked if the b-b-q grill would be a problem. And he said he was thinking he might buy a new grill for our visit. She told him she had just put a brand new one on the cottage next door -- so she switched them right then. Before leaving, we booked the cottage for the next summer. And when we arrived, there was a brand new grill on the b-b-q. She did it every year after that -- which was about 6 years in a row.

I miss my island.

_________________
self: allergy to sesame seeds and peanuts
3 sons each with at least one of the following allergies: peniciilin, sulfa-based antibiotic, latex, insect bites/stings


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 6:05 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
Posts: 6429
Location: Ottawa
That is a lovely story!

It's great to find that there are people out there who will get it and go out of their way to keep one safe and to remember it the following year is remarkable.

It also makes it even harder for those with family members who can't or don't seem to understand.

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Daughter: asthma, allergies to egg, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, most legumes (not soy) & penicillin. Developing hayfever type allergies.
Husband: no allergies
Me: allergies to some tree that flowers in May
Cat: allergic to beef, pork and lamb


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 6:54 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
Quote:
His brother tells him that his son will only eat hotdogs. Nothing else.


Your telling me this 10 year old (with no allergies I presume) must be accomidated in his rediculously picky food preferences :roll: ??? Suck it up kid...there's lots of food choices in the world and you should be feeling VERY fortunate that you have MANY OPTIONS!!! Not everyone has that luxury!

_________________
DD age 9 1/2 -peanuts, nuts,
DD age 7 1/2 - milk, eggs, chicken, peanuts, treenuts, cats, dogs,
DS age 2 1/2
Husband- asthma, eggs, treenuts, fish, shellfish environmental
Self - penicillan, eurithromiacin, mild laytex allergy.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 10:21 pm 
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Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2005 6:39 pm
Posts: 2928
Location: Toronto
AM - that woman's a hall of famer for we allergics.

Saskmommy2 - I sometimes feel that way when parents go on - and on - about not being able to feed their (non-allergic) child/children anything but peanut butter.

Uh ... you might want to introduce a few foods for his/her own sake. How about a ham sandwich? tuna, c'mon.

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Allergic to soy, peanut, shellfish, penicillin


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 8:13 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 03, 2005 9:38 pm
Posts: 1643
Location: Toronto
Gwen, one of my kids was one of *those* will only eat peanut butter kids. But when he became friends with a boy allergic to multiple foods including peanut, he never complained about not eating it around his friend. For years, my kids birthday parties were allergen safe for their friend. (He was allergic to peanuts, milk and a few other things.) We weren't asked to do this -- we just did it.

As for my little hot-dog eating friend ;) he may not even be aware of my allergies. But, I'm afraid to tell say in advance that we don't buy buns. If they find out, I'm worried they'll bring their own buns. If they get here and there are none -- it's to late to get them without making a scene. And if they bring them -- there will be a scene.

_________________
self: allergy to sesame seeds and peanuts
3 sons each with at least one of the following allergies: peniciilin, sulfa-based antibiotic, latex, insect bites/stings


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 8:15 pm 
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Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2005 6:39 pm
Posts: 2928
Location: Toronto
Ahh, the allergic life: the politics, the subterfuge.

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Allergic to soy, peanut, shellfish, penicillin


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 10:32 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
Last night after I posted here...I started craving hot dogs :? . I have not eaten meat in a few years with the exception of some organic beef lately. Well I turned into a lunatic who JUST HAD TO HAVE A HOT DOG NOW!!! I sent my husband to 2 stores, one for buns we can have and another for hot dogs and mustard and relish. Then I ate 2 hot dogs and went to bed feeling sick to the stomach.

_________________
DD age 9 1/2 -peanuts, nuts,
DD age 7 1/2 - milk, eggs, chicken, peanuts, treenuts, cats, dogs,
DS age 2 1/2
Husband- asthma, eggs, treenuts, fish, shellfish environmental
Self - penicillan, eurithromiacin, mild laytex allergy.


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