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PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 12:12 am 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
:shock: Oh no!!! That is terrible. We have the same rule "nothing unless mommy or daddy says that it is okay." My daughter asked if any adult who could read is allowed to tell if food is safe for her. We had a big talk. It is hard for them to say no to a cookie when an adult says that it is okay.

I told my daughter that not everyone knows all of the names of a particular food, and that I would not tell anyone with a soy allergy that any food is safe, because I am not that familiar with all the names for soy. I hope that she would refuse any food, but when an adult she knows and trusts is insisting it must really confuse them.

Sorry to hear that it happened again.


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 11:08 am 
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Joined: Thu May 19, 2005 8:33 pm
Posts: 96
Location: Ontario, Canada
What we've done recently is told my DS (6 yrs old) not to eat anything that is brought in at school. Unfortunately with the holidays coming more and more moms will be bringing in baked goods. His teacher has a bag of goodies (Smarties, Bear Paws, Kit Kat etc) that I gave her at the beginning of the year in case food is brought in. Our rule is that he can't eat anything brought in. The risk of cross contamination is just too great. I guess letting the teacher know your concerns and how valid your concerns are is the key. A respectful, concerned teacher is the key here. We honestly can't rely on our little ones to stand up to a teacher who says it's OK to eat something that may or may not be safe.

We thought our DS knew the importance of not eating anything brought into class but a few weeks ago he let it slip innocently that he tried a homemade cookie that was brought in b/c he thought it was safe. We reminded him the risks and I told him again that if he misses out on any treats at school I will make him something at home asap (ie choc chip cookies etc) to make up for him missing out. It's such a hard situation for little ones (and us parents) to handle on a daily basis.

_________________
SAHM of 3 children. Oldest DS (1999) is anaphylactic to peanuts.


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 11:47 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 6:53 pm
Posts: 1454
Location: Canada
Susan, I'm sorry to hear about that! This must be sooo frustrating and stressful---it isn't like your instructions are difficult to follow! The silver lining on this cloud is that your daughter is telling you about what is happening so you know that there is a problem. And also it is a good sign that eating food that adults pressure her into eating causes stress.

Lisa


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 09, 2005 7:47 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
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Location: Ottawa
Thanks Lisa, I'll trry to remember that.
She knows that she can get sick and she even knows there is a chance that she can die.
She won't eat something if we go out to dinner and I have overseen the preparation and can assure her it's safe (our friends are very careful and keep separate margaines etc for just such occassions)-but from this teacher-no problem.
4 years old is too small to entrust with so much responsibity but we must because the adults can't or won't get it.
My mother feels that this particuar teacher is a "people pleaser" and that she is trying to ingratiate herself to the child through food.
She sent me a note of appology. I'm keeping it on fie and wil send it back to her the next time it happens. (Yes, I fully expect this will happen a third time)
Our daughter is in 1/2 English and 1/2 French (immersion?) She has this teacher one week out of two and the same will happen next year so it is important that she understand and respect our decision. The next time I will use the Diabetes analogy (candy to a diabetic child). I will also write to the Board Trustee concerning safety in the schoo (Sabrina's Law will be in effect then)


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 09, 2005 11:11 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 6:53 pm
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Location: Canada
_Susan_ wrote:
I fully expect this will happen a third time


:!: I guess writing to the board trustees would be the best solution. It would be great if they would set up a board-wide policy of not feeding allergic children anything that has not been approved by the parents (and I think this was one of the recommendations on that document on managing anaphylaxis in the schools by Drs. Gold, Sussman et al.) I hate to say it, but allergic children will probably be safer if someone starts a lawsuit over these issues.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 13, 2006 8:58 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
Well it sure sucks to have to raise this topic again, the thread had been quiet for a while.

EVERY SINGLE SAFEGUARD, POLICY, PERSON INVOLVED WITH MY DAUGHTER AT SCHOOL FAILED TODAY!!!! :evil: (She is okay)

1. DO NOT FEED HER ANYTHING THAT HAS NOT COME FROM HOME...failed today. She was given jelly beans by a practicum student. The student was told by the teachers of my daughters allergy...but she assumed that "Oh, it is just a jelly bean". Did not even ask the teacher before taking it upon herself to decide what my daughter should be able to eat. The student was told while handing them out by the teachers helper not to give them to my daughter, but failed to tell anyone that she already had!!!! :evil: :evil: :evil: I was a practicum student at that very preschool in '97! The teacher should not have allowed the student to hand out the jelly beans!
The jelly beans were brought as a show and tell by another child.

2. DO NOT EAT ANY FOOD THAT HAS NOT COME FROM HOME...failed today.
My daughter did not refuse the jelly bean. She told me "I am always left out. I just did not want to be left out again." But, she is 4. I'm not mad at her, because I know that she in incapable of predicting the consequences of her actions. My daughter refused santa, and has NEVER done this!!! I was shocked! :shock:

3. DO NOT SEND ANY NUTS/OR SNACKS CONTAINING EVEN TRACES OF NUTS TO SCHOOL...failed today. I have requested that info be put in school news letters to tell parents that no traces of nuts be sent to school. Some of the schools other allergic kids eat what ever other parents send...so that is critical to their safety. Also, parents were told to read all labels...and send no foods that do not have labels, and no bulk foods. I phoned the parent who sent them when I got home because...there was no label on the jelly beans. I wanted to know the ingredients. She did not even have a label. They were from bulk.

It was my daughter that told me that she ate it...not the adult student that gave it to her. I would have hoped that the student would have at least told someone that she gave it to her, not try to hide it. This happened at the end of class while I was in the hallway.I immediately gave her benadryll even though she seemed fine, and left for home. Two minutes later we were home and my daughter was slightly red and blothchy near her lips and acting really strange. She was wanting to sleep, which is odd for her since she has not napped in two years. It had only been 5 minutes since she had benadryll.. so I figured it was too soon to be the benadryll making her sleepy. We headed for the hospital where we met my husband, who took my little one home for lunch. My oldest daughter and I were at the hospital the entire afternoon, waiting to see if she would have a severe reacion. OVER A F*^$ING JELLY BEAN!!!

Luckily she is fine. The doctor we saw was an intern, yet another student, oh joy. He was not equipted to handle a four year old with a nut allergy. It became clear that he knew SIGNIFICANTLY less that I do, and he went to get a real doctor. The whole thing reminded me of "Greys Anatomy" I felt like, "Look Alex, go get Dr. Mc Dreamy or his estranged wife...either one will be fine. This is over your head."

The other doctor did not seem to get the whole peanut/nut allergies can be really severe, with little exposure thing. I'm not sure if he even thought I should have come in. I told him "It takes a very little bit of peanut, as small as 1/7000 to 1/70,000 of a peanut ( I actually read that somewhere ) to cause a reaction, possibly a big reaction. With nuts, it is always better safe than sorry. I was concerned that my immediate dose of benadryll might be putting off a severe reaction, and that it might occur later, and they looked like "deer in headlights". When I used the term "biphasic reaction" I'm not sure if it registered with either of them what I was talking about. I said "when the benadryll wears off, the food she ate will still be in her body, will not yet be digested, and can therefore cause another reaction." They obviously had no idea what i was talking about. They just babbled inaccurate advise about allergies, and that anaphylaxis is rare...and I'm thinking "Don't you think you should ask me if I have previously seen an allergist, or have an epipen before you discharge her?" They also told me that a reaction is treated with benadryll, then steroids and in very rare cases...epinephrine, but only if there are significant signs of shock. I told them that it is the drug of choice well before shock sets in and I don't think they believed me.

When we got home I realized it is FRIDAY THE 13th. I'm not supersticious, but today was not a good day.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 13, 2006 9:28 pm 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
Posts: 6479
Location: Ottawa
OMG! :shock:
Don't be surprised that a child who says "No" to Santa will say "Yes" to another grown up. I have found that our daughter is very out spoken around people with whom she feels loved such as Mommy, Daddy, Santa, Grandma and her daycare provider. Other grown ups may be too intimidating to say "No" to.
How about putting something in writing to your teacher, principal, school board trustee, member of parliment (good time to press ofr Bill 3)?
D you know which Dr's treated (and I use the term loosely) your daughter at the hospital? Perhaps you should send a letter to the Chief Administer and ask your Allergist to follow up. Somebody needs to be re-educated!
I don't know what a Practicum Student is but she should be reprimanded, explained the seriousness and monitored more closely.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 13, 2006 10:38 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
The preschool is independantly run. So, no principal, no board of education, no nothing. Her teacher phoned our house while I was at the hospital, and I called back when I got home. She was really sorry, and will be much more careful in the future. Because my daughter is so "smart and allergy aware" they never thought that she would eat something that was not from home...however, she IS 4!!! I can not stress that enough...SHE IS 4!!! They realized that having treats for everyone and leaving her out probably is not the best for her feelings, so they will not do it in the future.

A practicum student is basically an intern, on an unpaid job placement as part of her schooling. She is in the same post secondary education that I took which is "Early Childhood Education" which focuses on education for children 5 and under. It qualifies you to run a licensed, government subsidized home day care, work in a day care, preschool teacher, and teachers aid for early grades and a few other jobs. To me, part of understanding how the mind of a child works, is the realization that they can not truely the one in charge of their own life threatening allergy. I would hope that others that work in the field would grasp that as well.

I have basically decided that my youngest will NOT be attending preschool next year, if at all. I thought I had found a good "fruit only" school for her next year (not the one my oldest is at ) but currently my faith and trust in others is very little. I am also a little scared of the other kids. Just yesterday at gymnastics a little boy kissed my youngest ...on the lips...and he had an egg for breakfast...isn't that wonderful! I wiped her face, and she was "going all blotchy and red" in a few places near her mouth. I gave her benadryll and she was okay. I have not had a good past few days as far as "faith in others" is concerned.

Unfortunately, we do not qualify for any of the preschools that are a part of the school system. They are all associated with schools in lower income areas of our city. If our daughter goes to preschool it would be private ( basically a business ), and not a part of public school, where I feel that I have no real "right" to demand safe surroundings. I even reconsidered homeschooling today while in the er waiting room, something that I had not thought about since october when I found a good school for kindergarten next year. I just have such a hard time trusting others...especially when people do things to remind me why I should not trust other people with my daughters.

As far as Bill 3 in Saskatchewan goes, I am trying really hard...but I feel like I must be the only one (or a limited few) in this province who really wants this. I've written the letters, I got a "everything will be fine, don't worry" response from the education minister and I've requested a meeting with my MLA, and am awaiting a response. I personally think that it is absolutely rediculous that something as important as Sabrinas Law has not been readily accepted federally. When it was passed for Ontario, didn't anyone ( politicians) from other provinces think "our kids deserve to be safe too". When it passed by unanimous vote why did no one (once again politicians ) think about trying to push it across canada and make it a federal law rather than a provincial one. It is a real "slap in the face" to me that no one (once again politicians ) thought to include the rest of canadian kids in this. My husband and I have even briefly discussed a move to Ontario. His employer really needs people in Ontario, and his company would be jumping for joy if he agreed to a move. Pretty pathetic though, that I would have to move to Ontario so my kids can go to school. However, with the cost of housing so much higher in Ontario than it is here, I would not be able to stay home, so that idea was scrapped.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2006 11:04 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 6:53 pm
Posts: 1454
Location: Canada
I'm sorry to hear about your experience with the school. It's shocking that so many people on this site have had trouble with the schools giving their kids 'treats'---I would have expected the schools to be just a bit more allergy aware these days.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2006 3:43 pm 
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Joined: Sat Oct 01, 2005 8:55 pm
Posts: 412
Location: Vancouver, BC
I am so sorry to hear about your horrible day yesterday. I started teaching a workshop on ana to ECE teachers/students 4 years ago, because they are getting no info in their school course. I guess we should be targetting the Nursing and Doctor level schools as well. I have recently come across incidents where doctors/nurses were giving out inaccurate info about anaphylaxis.

What I would do if I were you is carry a note from your allergist at all times stating how severe your daughters allergies are, and what is to be done in case of emergency.

I used to get frustrated all the time by the lack of awareness, but I was making myself crazy. Now, instead, I see myself as an expert on anaphylaxis, and I use every situation as a teaching opportunity. I have an excellent doctor, who I trust with all my concerns, but I know a lot more about anaphylaxis then she does. The nurses use me as a resource for information. That is really sad and frustrating, but at least I am there to give them the right information and to help them find out what they need to know. It shouldn't be my job to educate the health care professionals, but at this point there is no one else in BC, and as some famous person once said "if not me, who?'

If there is something about anaphylaxis I don't know I either ask Anaphylaxis Canada, or my allergist, who is one of the best in Canada, and I asked my doctor to send us to him, specifically, and not the allergist of her choice.

I don't know if that strategy will help you, but it helped me. You probably know more about anaphylaxis then anyone in Saskatchewan. Love is the biggest motivator, and you are a great mom who loves her girls.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 15, 2006 5:56 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
So the mother lf the child that brought the jelly beans to school phoned today to see if my daughter was okay, and to appologize. The jelly beans were from bulk, and were what was remaining in the bottom of a candy dish that had been left out over the christmas holidays at her house. A house full of christmas baking, other chocolates that were nut filled, and holiday nuts! She sent them to school because her daughters show and tell was to bring an item that started with the letter "J" , and she said that she gave no thought to allergies, even though she knows the schools policies, and knows how little exposure to nuts it takes to seriously harm an allergic child.


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 10:15 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
Posts: 1141
Location: saskatchewan, canada
So now, my daughter is refusing to go to school. On monday they had cinnamon bun making day...I made the dough and cinnamon spread, came to school, took them home, baked them and brought them back for snack. But, it was already someone elses snack day so all the other kids also got yogurt and fruit.

So, my daughter basically broke down in tears last night about being different, being left out, and that she hates being herself. She wishes that she could be anyone else in the class because they are normal. She also expressed her fears that she can not trust the teachers to not give her food she is allergic to, and does not like having to be in charge of her own allergy at school (she is 4). She said "I like it at home, where I am not left out, i am not different and I do not need to be scared of the food my mommy gives me." She added "kindergarden will be the same, i will always be left out, and so will grade one and I'm done going to school! I have not learned anything at school anyways, all I have learned is that I get left out, and need to be scared of the adults giving me foods that could make me really sick."

She begged me to not make her go anymore, and asked if I could be her teacher because I taught her all the stuff she knows already. I am not planning on sending her tomorrow or this week because I can not look her in the eye and tell her that it will be allright. I feel that she is right, I don't trust other people with my kids...and I have good reason not to.


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 11:32 pm 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
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Location: Ottawa
Saskmommy, I feel for you and your little girl.
I'm glad that she is able to verbalize her feeings, that will help her to sort them out.
Are you able to take her to a support group so that she can meet other people with allergies? You've said you live in a small community so it may not be feasible. It helped our daughter to meet others with the same issues.
I know it is so tempting to shut out the rest of the world and keep them safe at home. We have to help them develop techniques to be safe and feel secure as they slowly pull away from us. Have you discussd this with the school? What are they willing to do to fix this problem (which they created?). I get realy upset to think that a child is ostrcised due to a medical condition. That is discrimination and is wrng.
You may need to petition to get a school aide so that she feels supported at school. (i'm not sure how that is done)


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 18, 2006 12:11 am 
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Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 11:39 pm
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Location: saskatchewan, canada
I have looked into a support group, but none exist locally or in the larger city 90minutes away. She knows some other kids with allergies...but some of them do things that are definitely not safe, and an accident waiting to happen. So I don't want her getting ideas like "so and so can eat at dairy queen, why can't I?"

With the preschool the kids all take turns bringing snack, and she brings a bagged lunch. All other nut/peanut allergic kids in the school ( none of which are in her class ) eat what ever shows up that another kid has brought. The jelly bean from the "bowl left out over christmas" proves my point that other parents can not be expected to prepare a snack for kids with allergies. The parents who let their kids eat whatever shows up are playing with fire...so that their kids do not feel left out.

Another preschool in our area ( the one that was willing to go milk free next year, and at the nut free school we would attend for kindergarten ) does snack differently. All kids bring a bagged snack everyday. This would have eliminated her feeling different but this school is new this year, and I did not know of their snack policy or I would have placed my daughter there instead. I am planning on calling them tomorrow to see if they have space available and would take my daughter mid-year like this...if my daughter is willing to change schools. Currently, I don't think she will go back to her present preschool.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 18, 2006 12:16 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 6:53 pm
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Location: Canada
saskmommy, what about talking with the teacher and the teacher's aide to discuss your daughter's fears and ask them for help---if the suggestion isn't forthcoming from them, you might suggest that they reassure your daughter that from now on no one will feed her any food that has not come from home (maybe your daughter should come with you to the meeting). perhaps you could ask them to explain to your daughter what they are doing to keep her safe.....this as well will reinforce the safety measures you put in place. Perhaps too they might choose an age appropriate story book about an allergic child to read to the class to help the other kids understand and to help your daughter feel supported.

although kids with learning or sensory or physical disabilities do need extra support, i think it would be better for a society as a whole if kids who were visibly 'different' were included in a regular classroom at least for some activities because then kids would see more readily that people are different....it might help them be more accepting of 'difference' in themselves and in others.


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