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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2011 9:55 pm 
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Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 8:27 am
Posts: 6
Feeling kind of alone and would love some support from those who "get it".

We were just at a family party when my multiple-food allergic son began to have a reaction. Luckily it was not anaphylaxis but the hives all around his mouth gave me quite a scare. We left the party early and thankfully he is fine. What makes me sad is no one from the party has yet to call to see how he is doing (2 hours later)...ever have this happen to you?

FYI - I have determined that his reaction must have been to something he touched as he is very contact sesitive to milk & peanuts. He only ate food I pepared by my from home so luckily Benedryl did the trick.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 01, 2012 11:06 am 
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Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2008 9:40 pm
Posts: 2034
Location: ottawa
:huggy :huggy :huggy
Firstly.....how is your son today?

I am so glad the reaction wasn't worse. Being that you were in another person's home I agree that between people, household items, toys etc. he most likely then touched something causing the reaction (this has happened to DS in other people's homes also).
I AM SO SORRY that no one has called you to see how he is. From our own situations I find that this is a combination of people seeing that a reaction 'looks minor' so they don't worry to just not getting the fact that something so minor can escalate VERY quickly into something very serious.
What we live every second is more like an out of sight out of mind thing for others...I am guessing they knew your son was with you...gone home and assumed he would therefor be fine.
After braving a Christmas party at friends when DS was a baby (already had multiple ana allergies at the time and everyone wanted to HOLD HIM :frightened ...and eat) we made it right through dinner unscathed then to dessert. Suddenly I realized he was breaking out all over in rash/hives. Turned out although the host was 'clear' no nuts/sesame/peanuts that a guest had brought a square with peanut butter IN it and thought that would be ok. So the reaction was manageable with benadryl , here also the trace from people eating must have been what got onto DS. I gave him a bath right there and changed his clothes. The hostess was amazing and very aware but others 9(this time and beyond) usually say things like 'oh well good thing you caught it' or ' could have been worse'. I don't think people mean to be callous but to them it's like, you know what to do, all is good.

I GET how much this hurts as just one text or phone call checking in would make all the difference in the world and validate that others really do care (even if they do but just show it in a different way). We all know here on the forum what a HUGE step it is just to prepare to go to someone else's home especially when huge amounts of food are about, I am sorry it ended with you going home but glad your son was with you and being a super allergy mommy you handled it perfectly.
We're here for you....vent away and HUGE HUGS!!

_________________
DD 12 yrs -no allergies
4 yr old DS - asthma/eczema Anaphylactic to Peanuts, all tree nuts, sesame , all pea/lentil legumes, gelatin.
Allergic to trees, grass,ragweed, feathers, dander, mold and dust.
Outgrew eggs, fish, shellfish


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 01, 2012 12:48 pm 
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Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 8:27 am
Posts: 6
Thank you so much for this post, it's nice to hear from someone who gets it. My son is thankfully better now but I did not get much rest...too stressed out in case of a bi-phasic reaction in the middle of the night.

Take care and Happy New Year!


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 01, 2012 3:38 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jul 05, 2010 11:37 am
Posts: 1523
Location: Alberta
:huggy to you and yours. I have found it helps to remember that I too was very ignorant of the whole allergy thing until I saw for myself how quickly it can go downhill. I would imagine that it is like that for most people...(I hope that the people in the Alberta Legislature would have a different view of things after seeing a big guy like Danyluk react...we'll see).

Education & awareness.....goes a long way & "getting it" saves lives.

In the meantime....you go with your instinct and grow your "allergy mama" skin. :huggy again.

_________________
Myself - Seasonal, cats
dd-asthma (trigger - flu) anaphylactic to eggs, severe allergies to bugspray and penicilin,pulmicort
ds-Seasonal, cats and OAS
dh-allergy cats, bugspray and guava, outgrew egg allergy


Last edited by alberta advocate on Mon Jan 02, 2012 2:00 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2012 1:09 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:45 pm
Posts: 797
Location: Vancouver, BC
I'm glad to hear your son is OK. Dealing with well meaning relatives can be frustrating when they don't totally get it!

_________________
DD 2004 Allergy to peanuts, egg, sesame, and new: lentils and chick peas
DS 2006 Allergy to peanuts, tree nuts, milk, egg, kiwi fruit, eczema


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2012 2:02 am 
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Joined: Mon Jul 05, 2010 11:37 am
Posts: 1523
Location: Alberta
And sometimes when they do get it...life changes, people get old and forget it. :)

_________________
Myself - Seasonal, cats
dd-asthma (trigger - flu) anaphylactic to eggs, severe allergies to bugspray and penicilin,pulmicort
ds-Seasonal, cats and OAS
dh-allergy cats, bugspray and guava, outgrew egg allergy


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2012 12:02 pm 
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Site Admin

Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 pm
Posts: 6455
Location: Ottawa
Bens_advocate, I can imagine that Saturday evening was an emotional rollercoaster for you! I'm so glad that Ben's doing better now.

Don't be too harsh that family didn't call. They probably didn't know what to say. They might have been worried about calling too soon, too late, if you were at the hospital etc.
Let the host know that he was thankfully OK.

Is there a relative that you can talk candidly to? (either you or spouse can do the communicating but it should be blood to blood) Mention to this person how isolating it was for your family to go thru a serious medical emergency while the rest of the world was whooping it up. Nothing they could say, would have changed your son's situation but even a message on the answering machine letting you know that you were being thought of would have helped.

In the end, 2011 went out with a bang; let's hope that 2012 is better for Ben!

_________________
Moderator
Daughter: asthma, allergies to egg, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, most legumes (not soy) & penicillin. Developing hayfever type allergies.
Husband: no allergies
Me: allergies to some tree that flowers in May
Cat: allergic to beef, pork and lamb


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